Notes

Shooshy,

I retrieved some notes from my phone. Hope you enjoy them:

6/11/16

Little life, I believe I felt you wiggle around tonight. 👣

12 wks 4 days

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1/1/17

"It's been a challenge to think of much else but you and your needs. 

You're so helpless, my little love.

I'd like to reflect on where life has brought me this year. 

It made me something I only dreamed of one day becoming: a mother. 

Time before knowing of you seems distant and yet not.

This year was mostly me, waiting for your arrival, 

making time pass by with work and taking some classes. 

It seems aimless now. Time leading up to this moment seems pointless, really.

But dad and I have also been making a home for us. 

And that journey within itself has been quite a thing of beauty. 

We've created love and because of love, you came into existence.

This year taught me to go with it and trust the divine timing of it all."

7/25/17

"Hailey

You are everything that came before

You carry looks from afar

You gesture like the past

You smile because you know

Everything and everyone who came here before you"

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8/3/17

"I define everything for her

I am a given for her

But then she

sees something more in him

And I understand why

Because I see it too.

Everyday you seem more aware of your dad. 

You look in his direction and kick your feet vigorously, or pump your hands up and down. 

"Hey dad!! Look at me," says your expression, "I'm looking ! Look what I can do!"

It's past midnight and you're in bed with us. 

Your dad is snoring and you are also breathing loudly 

but I am so comforted by it all in this moment."

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And let the record note, Hailey Pepper, you snore like your father.

Love you stinky face,

Mama

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